The story behind the ‘Cookie Licker’ subtitle

24 May

My subtitle “Confessions of a Cookie Licker” has, like everything else in my life, a story.  I’m known by all to be long winded and this story is no exception.  I come by my story telling honestly, as my Dad was one of the best story tellers ever.  Let me preface this story with saying that I was on my 40 day fast and can’t be held responsible for my actions during that dark time in my life.

Here’s what happened:

My husband had a death in the family and he was really sad and the man LOVES chocolate chip cookies, don’t even have to be fancy, and homemade or slice and bake, he loves them either way.  I didn’t have all the ingredients at home to make homemade cookies and truly didn’t want to, so I bought some awesome chocolate chunk cookies that you break and bake.  That night I baked them for him, and our baking stone that we love broke and we are getting it replaced (what a pain in the butt by the way!  Pampered Chef baking stones rock but it was really annoying to get through the process of having it approved for replacement with no cost to me) so I had to use this old junky cookie sheet and I prayed that they would come out okay.  I’m also dealing with an old, junky oven, so baking is a tad bit hard since I don’t think it’s calibrated correctly and burns a little hot.  So, I bake them and they. Smell. So. Good. OMG  I let them cool, and Husband isn’t home yet so I put them in a container for him so they won’t dry out.  And I’m having to be careful to not lick my fingers.  While I was placing them on the cookie sheet, little chocolate chunks would fall off and I wanted to eat them so badly, but resisted.  So I get them in the box, and I just stood there, smelling the box so hard I swear I could have inhaled a crumb or two!  And I think you see where this is heading.  The chocolate was all melty, but not runny, and they were perfection.  I pick one up, to just smell it better and for some crazy reason, I lick the bottom, the underside, of one.  That’s not cheating, right?  No calories consumed, I’m good.  Well, it was anti-climatic, didn’t taste like anything, so I put it back in the container.  I didn’t think that was weird, he’s my husband after all and it’s not like I got it all soggy with my tongue or anything.  So  a day or two later I’m telling two friends at work about the cookie licking and they laughed their butts off, at how crazy I am and how gross they thought that was.  So that night I tell Husband, “I have a confession to make.”  And he’s all engrossed in something on TV and barely even looks my way and I proceed, “You know the other night when I baked you those cookies?” 


“Well they smelled so good, I had to just stand there and smell them, like HARD.  And for some reason, I have no idea why, I picked one up, and I licked it.  The bottom I mean.” 

That gets his attention.  He looks over at me and starts cracking up!  And says “Wow.  Why does that not surprise me?” 

“I also put that one back in the container, which you later ate out of.  Is that gross?” 

He shrugs.  “No, I mean. . .” 

“Exactly!  We’re married, it’s not weird!  Exactly!” 

And he is still laughing. 

And I say “But you know what?  “I should have licked the TOP of it, I think that part is what tastes better.  Because the bottom tasted like the counter top.  Well what I imagine a counter top tastes like anyway, if you licked it.”


One Response to “The story behind the ‘Cookie Licker’ subtitle”

  1. Kristi Webb May 25, 2011 at 4:15 pm #

    You are right…you get it honest! Your dad was an amazing story teller and an amazing person. You are so much like him! I love reading your stuff and am so excited about the blog!

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